Reflection: Year "2-Thousand & 6"

It is the end of the year now with only two more days until the New Year. I know that time doesn't change, but the year has sped by with lightening speed. If they [years] keep speeding by like this, before I know it I will be old. Yeah Right! LOL. Any ways, after taking some time to reflect over the past year, I cannot say that my year began good or bad. I can say that with everything I have learned, the year will forever remain unforgettable. There are two things I have learned that I would like to share:

1. Fall madly in love with God. Each step in our spiritual walk creates a deeper love in our relationship with God. His love for us doesn't change, but our love for Him does. He knows us inside out whereas we learn more and more about Him. Look at your walk with God like a relationship. You meet Him, you date Him (We even get the courting!), you hook up in holy matrimony and spend a lifetime getting to know Him. Guess what ladies? He is the perfect husband. He loves strong. He is passionate about us and our children. He gives us His undivided attention. He is forgiving and merciful. He gives the perfect gifts every time and He is an excellent listener. I would like to say that I've got so much game that I found such a wonderful man, but in all honesty, He found me just like He will find you (if He already hasn't). What can I say, when He found me I couldn't resist! =)
2. You can never out-give God. Give Him all you've got and give it with joy. Because what He will give back to you could pass any dream you have ever dreamt, any treasure you have ever sought or any goal you have ever set. Dream bigger because that's what He wants for you. Think wider because He didn't put limits to what we can accomplish. Give more because He will give better.
   

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The Heartbeat of God

God was in the house last night. I once asked myself if we can talk too much about "how powerful" a service is or how many times that "God moved mightily in our service". Having come from "the world" into a place that is "not of this world", I didn't really understand how God is everywhere and is always moving. We can't avoid Him and we can't hide from Him. He is here at all times which is why it is not unbelievable to always have a move of God. It is almost like we are swaddled up in a blanket and being carried on the bosom of God.

Last night, during our song service (well, during the one song we were able to play since God did move so powerfully), there was a moment when the keyboard was silent, the guitar was silent and it was only the singers and the drummer. To me, it felt like I was hearing the heartbeat of God. With each hit of the drum and the words of the music "You Are Awesome in This Place Mighty God" it was as if the world was still and God "was" moving. He was breathing on us while we were living on Him. Nothing really mattered because we were having life pumped into us as the Holy Spirit ran through our veins.

So, the only word I could use to accurately describe the service last night is "powerful". There is nothing more powerful than being next to the heartbeat of God. There is nothing like it. There is comfort next to The Heartbeat. There is assurance next to The Heartbeat. There is peace next to The Heartbeat. There is power next to The Heartbeat and there is life.

Christmas Time

Here is a pic of my wonderful son Anthony, my beautiful niece Laila and their mommies during Christmas Time in '05.

Microwave OverKill

You know, there are some days that the clock just won't stop ticking and there are days when it completely stops. Yesterday, as I was warming up my tea (to tackle this sore throat issue I've had for a few days), my microwave died. I couldn't believe it! You never know how dependent you are on technology until you no longer have it. For me, a person who doesn't like to be in the kitchen and doesn't really like to cook but is learning because I one day want to please my future husband with my culinary art skills, could not handle this loss. I wanted to learn some good old fashion cooking, not learn how to do it the old fashion way...by the oven. Call me young, but this is a little too ol' skool for me. I need instant. I need a MICROWAVE!

Secret Sister Revealing

We had our Secret Sister revealing tonight. I had a wonderful time eating, playing games and determining where my mental state is =). Sister Bernice hooked it up with the cooking and the enchiladas were excellent. Sister Sabrina ended up being my Secret Sister. Thanks to my Secret Sister, I got my very first coffee pot, can of coffee, filters and my very own coffee mug. I guess I am no longer considered a beginner, but I think I have graduated to the intermediate class of coffee drinkers.

Is it Worth the Risk?

I received an article today called The Changing Workplace. It talks about the changing culture of workplaces today. I am blogging about this not just because I would love to work for a place like this, but because this concept clearly says RISK. The risk outlined in this article that was taken by Best Buy has helped to keep them at the top of their competition.

I began to think about a conversation I had a few days ago about risk. The comment was made that some are more willing to take risk than others. Is it necessarily bad because the risk they took would not have been taken by another? When we see someone take the risk that we would consider stupid or dangerous, could it possibly be that we are afraid of taking risk ourselves? Really, how much risk are we willing to take?

I'm not a risk taker, but when I was younger I did some pretty stupid things. I was so willing to take the risk that the danger didn't matter. My mind was so captivated by the appeal of the task ahead that risk wasn't even a recognizable word in my vocabulary. Risk was simply seen as just living life. Now, there are some things that I would not do if I would have put some thought into it, but its that dare-devil that I need to reach back and get a hold of. I want to achieve growth, but yet when the growth requires risk, the appeal of achieving that growth kind of fizzles down. How can I ever do better if I never try to see if I can do better?

In Best Buy's case, the risk was worth it. When it means millions of dollars, or rather millions of souls, is it worth the risk?

Thank You Cards

We distributed most of Anthony's fundraiser items to the rightful owners today. Anthony wrote out some thank you cards (with the help of mommy) and attached them with the items. Even though the words were not quite ledgible on two of the cards and he wrote his name on the front of the other card instead of in the inside, it was still perfect. There is so much power in a thank you, especially from a loveable young man like my son. It was a blessing to see the smiles on the faces of the receivers. Sometimes, just a simple thank you is enough to brighten the day and the return smile is an awesome "You're Welcome."

Rat Alert

Okay, I could make this the official home of the "I hate rats" club. I was sitting down all ready to blog just as I heard running on the roof and then clawing on the side of the house. Talk about losing all concentration. I can't even tell you what I was about to write because my hair is too busy sticking up on my arms. I pray that it was a cat because I cannot handle the rats anymore. Yuck!

Am I In-Love?

I read this blog today, Why I Think God is Amazing, and couldn’t help but question, am I in love with God? Can you really fall in love with God? There have been times when I think of God more as a parent than as a partner. Yet, there have been times when I think of Him as my soul mate instead of an elder. Although, I fear Him, I love Him and there are days when I lose my breath thinking about life without Him. There were times when I would get upset with Him (unrightfully so), but every time that I would ask for forgiveness, He forgave me. I had tried hard to make this relationship work only to find out that 100% of the time it was my fault. LOL. Past my immediate family, I have never fallen in love before because all I experienced was infatuation (took some aging to realize this). I don’t know what love feels like. But I get butterflies in my stomach thinking about Him, my heart skips a beat when I seek Him, and I can’t help but smile when I’m near Him. It makes me wonder, have I fallen in love?

I've Got the VICTORY!

Today, I have had such a wonderful day. I can’t say that my hardships have changed, but something in me just wants to scream and shout "I’ve Got the VICTORY!" You know when you feel the tingling sensation all over and your stomach has butterflies. Or when you just want to run throughout the house and jump all around. That’s what I feel. Nothing out of the ordinary happened, I didn’t receive a large sum of money and I have not witnessed someone turning their life over to God today. But, I feel like the Extraordinary is sitting in my living room, that I just received a pot of gold and I just witnessed an infilling of the Holy Ghost. In the words of my favorite cereal character, Lucky Charms, I would have to say that today was magically delicious…or rather, spiritually delicious.

Snoopy on Ice

Last night we went to Knott's Berry Farm to see Snoopy on ice in "Snoopy's Cool Christmas". The story line was about the Snoopy Gang finding out the true meaning of Christmas. With the help of the ice skaters and each member of the snoopy gang, we [the audience] were eventually revealed the true meaning of Christmas; to celebrate the birth of our new born king, Jesus. It was amazing! Amongst a time where the stores do not want to even say "Merry Christmas" yet alone bring the true meaning of Christmas back into Christmas, Knott's Berry Farm brought it back in full force. As we sat in our seats anticipating the next moves of the ice skaters, the true meaning of Christmas was brought back to us by the reading of the scriptures from the Bible. Yes, they actually read scriptures from the bible to help us remember the true meaning of Christmas!

Is this the beginning of the end of Christmas falsehoods and "Happy Holidays"? Are we going to start hearing "Merry Christmas" again when we walk into the stores? Have we in this society gone so far to avoid Jesus that we feel compelled to bring Him back into our lives? I hope so. There were would be no Christmas, no holiday to celebrate (even though we have taken it and turned it upside down), no presents, nothing if Jesus was not born. There is no Christmas without Jesus and I'm glad that someone other than the church has recognized it.

Thank you Knott's Berry Farm helping us to remember the true meaning of Christmas.

With Faith, Not Worth

"For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith. Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them." -Mark 11:23-24

This is one of my favorite verses. One reason I love it so much is because Jesus never said we had to be worthy to receive what we believe. He said we must have faith enough to believe and receive what we are asking for. If these verses said "...but shall believe and be worthy so that those things which he saith shall come to pass" or "...believe and be worthy so that ye receive them..." we would be in some big trouble. No one is worthy and we wouldn't receive one thing if that was the criteria. This is a wonderful example of God's grace and mercy. He knows we are not worthy, yet He loves us so much that he made faith so easy. We don't deserve it, but He is willing to give it to us any ways. He has so much mercy that he did not place hard restrictions on faith and He has so much grace that He will answer our prayers with what we desire. We receive our blessings through faith, not worth. Isn't God good? YES, all the time!

Happy Thanksgiving

I am wishing everyone a Happy Thanksgiving early. I will be sharing this holiday with my family, which means that I will be biz-ee. My niece thinks I am to be used at her discretion and my son eventually gets a tiny bit jealous, so I am constantly juggling between the two. I have to admit, I love it. So, I wish you all a blessed holiday and a happy Thanksgiving. God Bless.

Working for God

To put another note about work, my coworker said this to me the other day, "I have to remember that I am working for God." Wonderfully put! Each day I walk into work (even when I can't wait to leave the moment I get in), I have to remember that I am working for God. It makes the day so much brighter just thinking about my task ahead. Think about it.

• With God the bonus possibilities are unlimited (He doesn't limit us, we only limit ourselves),
  
• The promotions are many and not few & far in between (There is always room for spiritual growth).
  
• When I need help in dealing with a situation, I am not pushed to the side (God is available when I need Him).
  
• Plus, I get a window seat. Actually, even better. I get a corner office on the top floor (He only wants the best for me).
  
• I have Security blocking the traffic (because God only gives us what we can handle) and
  
• A Janitor to help clean up my mess (God helps us even when it is our fault. See the story of Abraham and his wife Sarah).
  
• I can drive the company car(because He supplies my every need) and
  
• Fly in the company airplane (because He supplies us with our needs as well as our desires).
  
• And the best of all. I get fresh, pure, living water each and every day and not Arrowhead (no offense to those who like Arrowhead).
  

What a job! What a job! Boy-o-boy, I love working for God!

Holidays

As I sit here and just think about going into work tomorrow, I can already feel my anxiousness of getting out of work so that my holidays can begin. I love the holidays and although I don't want them to go by too quickly, I can't wait for them to come. With Thanksgiving just a couple of days away, I feel anxious and ready to hit the road to begin celebrating all the wonderful things that God has given me and all the things I have been able to give to others. It just makes me happy! I love this time of year.

My Little Man

Here is a pic of my little man at our Harvest Party. Let me share with you a funny story on how we decided that he would be a cowboy.

For the Treats on the Streets festival that is held every year in Orange, Anthony went as Batman. We already had the cape, mask, breast plate and belt. All he needed was the body suit, so I thought it would be a good idea to just use what we have. So, I packed up some grey pants a black shirt and his batman outfit and sent him over to Terry's. I met them after work since Treats on the Streets starts a 4:00p.m. and I didn't get off until 5. Well, to make a long story short, when I seen my little man I couldn't help but think that he was the ghetto-ist looking cowboy I had seen. Let's just say that he looked homemade. And of course Anthony had no clue that his mother sent him out of the house looking like that, so let's just say that I persuaded him to go as a cowboy from then on out. Looking at this picture, I think Anthony made a good choice!

On the Ice

For any of you who don't know what I look like, here is a picture of me on the ice. I can't tell you if this was before or after I began falling. I looked pretty happy, so I would say that it was probably before.

It Was Beautiful

I was talking to my coworker this morning and she said something that really stuck out. She was describing her dinner last night with her fiance and his mother and said that the night was a blessing from God. She said it [last night] had to be because the night could only be described as "beautiful". That is a word fit for a King!

Amongst all of the trials that we must endure, having to rush through our night only to have to battle through the next day, it was awesome that she was able to pause and see the beauty that could only be created by God. It doesn’t have to be a struggle to live for God and it definitely does not have to be ugly. Sometimes, we just have to wait and be still in order to bring back into focus the beauty of life.

C2C Night: Relationships

Tonight in C2C we talked about relationships. I quite enjoyed myself. The first thing that Bro Frank asked us to do was to write down all the things we would want in a spouse. It was funny in a sad way, but I thought of more things that I didn’t want in a spouse than I thought of what I did want in a spouse. That was eye opening because I have been in a somewhat fear of marriage. I have wanted to get married for so long, but now that I have truly enjoyed my single life, I have been seeing the things that marriage would take away from me.

But, that is not the way to look at marriage, even when I am comfortable in my current situation. Having to think of the good qualities only made me realize that as long as I am in the will of God, it will be all right. There are so many things to look forward to, but so much to be patient and wait for. There is so much that I would want from my spouse, yet there is so much that I need to learn to give.

Marriage is so many things and so much more than just love and infatuation. Marriage is so many things that tonight I couldn’t name them all.

Rat Problem

I had to give an update on my rat problem. So far I haven't seen it again. Gabriel came over to finish raking my back yard the day following my incident and he saw the rat run under my house (a con to living in an old house. Old houses don't generally sit on foundation but are lifted up). However, with all my might and every last string of will power left in me, I managed to take the trash out today without running away. Yes! One point for the human!

She Knew The Way

I love my mother.
She’s a beautiful star in my night
A shining ray of sunlight.
She brought me up the way she thought I should go
Gave me to God and dedicated her soul
I love my mother
Although I only had five years with her,
I have come to know her as if she is with me each day
I’ve come to understand her choices
I’ve come to accept her leaving
Because I know that she knew which way I should go

When I ran away into the world,
I couldn’t let go of what she had taught me
When I sought after every possible moment of happiness
I couldn’t forget her joy
When I think about how her life was dedicated to a God and His church
I think about how I dedicate mine
And with all these thoughts
I know she loved me so,
Because she taught me the way I should go.

Today I live my life for this God
And I’m showing my son the same
So when my son thinks God is bigger than Batman
And stronger than Superman
I can’t help but say
This is all because I have a God who loves me so much
That He gave me a mother
Who knew the way I should go.

Ice Skating

Youth Alive went ice skating tonight for our monthly event. I don't think I have ever been so unbalanced on my feet and fallen so much since we began going ice skating. But...I have never had as much fun ice skating as I had tonight.

Just Another Night

Tonight's church service was off the hook. I was contemplating not going since I had been battling with a fever since Friday. I had thought for a moment that maybe I should rest and gain some energy. But it's always when you miss that the best services happen. It's a bummer to hear everyone else rant-&-rave about the service that you weren't at. Plus I had said to myself that if I miss one church service due to the illness I would finally go to the ER. There are various reasons why I didn't want to do that. So, I had Sis Terry pick me up and we were off. Good thing I didn't miss tonight's service because it would have been those "You missed a great service" nights. God moved in a mighty way. Because of the excitement of tonight's service (and because I found a rat in my broken trash can in my backyard and now it's currently hanging out in the trees in my front yard) I have found it hard to settle down. And just to think, tonight could have been just another night if I hadn't gone to church.

Not Until You Bless Me

“And Jacob was left alone; and there wrestled a man with him until the breaking of the day. And when he saw that he prevailed not against him, he touched the hollow of his thigh; and the hollow of Jacob's thigh was out of joint, as he wrestled with him. And he said, Let me go, for the day breaketh. And he said, I will not let thee go, except thou bless me.” Genesis 32:24-26

I have asked God for His blessings in several different areas of my life. Some things are more urgent than others. Although I have not seen every prayer fulfilled, I will not let go until God blesses me. I believe that there are going to be trials where every bone will ache in your body, where every day seems to put you on wits end. There will be days were you think you will make it through without having to fight only to find out that the night has brought another story. There might be nights where sleep is hard to find, and there might be nights where all you can do is sleep. Through it all, it is imperative to hold on until you have victory. Do not let go until ye be blessed. As I’ve heard it said before, Just keep holdin’ on. Just keep holdin’ on.

Now and Later

"And he charged them, and said unto them, I am to be gathered unto my people, bury me with my fathers in the cave that is in the field of Ephron the Hittite,...There they buried Abraham and Sarah his wife; there they buried Isaac and Rebekah his wife, and there I buried Leah." Genesis 49: 29 & 31

As I was reading this passage, it dawned on me that Leah was blessed after her death. If you are not familiar with the story of Jacob, Jacob was in love with Leah's sister Rachel. He served 14 years in their father, Labon's house for Rachel, seven of those were required after Labon deceitfully gave Leah instead of Rachel. So Jacob was first married to Leah who blessed him with many children and then to Rachel whom after years of being baron was finally able to give Jacob two children.

Jacob sorely loved Rachel while Leah had to sit back and suffer the wounds of a woman unloved. All she wanted was for her man to love her like he did her sister. Leah even bribed her sister to let her have Jacob for one night with her [Leah]. Still, Jacob's love was unwavering.

Well, Rachel died in child birth and Leah's death was not mentioned except in the verse above. But, ultimately, Leah got her man. It was with her that he was buried. Although she was not alive to receive it, but her blessing came about after her death.

I believe we will all have blessings come to pass and prayers filled after our death. We don't live for the blessings to stop the moment we die, but we are building up an alter, sacrafices to God so that He may look down and bless continually. We sacrifice so that the blessings can be passed on, now and later.

Experience

When a guest walks into the church and feels excited about what they've experienced, then we have made a step toward remarkable. When they truly anticipate the next visit, then you know what they have experienced is memorable.

Anthony Had A Good Day

Anthony had a wonderful day in school today. He received three stars and stayed on green all day. He almost completed all of his work and his teacher said that although he needed more time he was working hard. Great job little man! I am proud of you.

Healed!

As I sit here and recover from my sickness, I reflect back on where I was a year ago. Do you know, last year I got sick 15 times. Each time required me to pay a $20 copay in addition to the cost of my medication. Often times, I walked away spending $100 per visit after the office visit and medication. When you get sick twice in one month, $100 is a lot. That is a lot period!

Last year I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, Osteopenia, Anemia, overactive thyriod, and after all these years I became allergic to penicilin. It seemed like almost everything I ate or touched gave me an allergic reaction. On top of this, I was told that I would need surgery for my cystic fibrosis. If you don't know what all this means, don't worry. All you need to know is that it is as bad as it sounds. As you can imagine, it was a tough year for Anthony and myself.

I sit hear tonight, beaten up by this sickness I have been battling but I am blessed because I already received a healing. I have not gone back for testing on any of these things except for the overactive thyroid, but I have been healed. Actually, I joke that I have been overhealed.

Fibromyalgia is when you have pain in your muscles. It also affects your thinking. There was a point in time last year when I didn't want to be touched because it hurt too bad. I didn't want to be prayed for because that would require for me to be touched which woud cause horrible shooting pain that would radiate through my entire body. I no longer have the pain and haven't had it for months. Fibromyalgia goes in cycles, but it has been over 6 months since I have had any pain. I am healed.

Osteopenia is a form of Osteoperosis. It is a lack of calcium in the bones. I was one point away from having Osteoperosis. Last year, by bones would hurt and it was hard for me to heal after the accident I had a year before. My bones no longer hurt. And trust me, you know when your bones hurt. It's worse than the pain in the muscles because there really isn't any medication that can help elivate the pain. I am healed.

Anemia is when you lack iron in your blood. I almost killed Granny, Anthony and myself last year because I passed out while driving and stopped in the middle of an intersection after church one night. The low iron level would make me dizzy and I would pass out just as quickly as you are reading this. Also, I got cold really easy. I never left without a jacket and always wore boots. I would get cold on a summer night. I could never sleep with a fan running or I would get sick. I believe God overhealed me on this one. I kid you not, but I get serious hot flashes. I am only 27. I should not be getting hot flashes. I can even ride in the same car as Sis Sabrina who must have the cold air going at all times since she is hot blooded. She even admitted I was healed on this one because I asked her to turn the air on the other day.

I can't remember the symptoms of the overactive thryoid and although I don't think I am allergic to penicillin, my doctor still won't give me penicillin (which is why this sickness won't go away). As far as the cystic fibrosis, I can't really explain but this one scared me more than the rest because it required surgery. Let's just say, I don't need surgery and I am normal again. Thank you Jesus.

Sometimes I need to remind myself of the miraculous healing that God has done in my life. Especially during a time like this when I am sick, it appears to be getting better although I am feeling worse in the process. God has healed me!!! Not just once, but in 7 different ways. Six were physical healings and the 7th was a spiritual healing. How could I not believe in God's healing power when I've only been sick 3 times this year!

That's My Business

"...Any church involved seriously in serving others must become risk takers. Spiritual risk is the healthy child of biblical faith. It is the day-to-day, responsible, obedient action of the Christian and the church motivated by the love and grace of God. That's our business as the church people of God. We honor God by having enough faith to take some risks in the process of investing in people...But the biggest losers are often those who fail to take any risk, for while they limit their potential for loss, they also have no chance to reap the rewards."
- Gary L. McIntosh, Beyond the First Welcome Visit

Why do we outreach?

Because that's our business as children of God

Why do we witness?

Because that's our business as children of God

Why do we push beyond the four walls of the church?

Because that's our business as children of God

Why do we push out of our comfort zones?

Because that's our business as children of God

We as church people of God have a responsibility to take risk in souls. IT'S OUR BUSINESS. It's our job and we are backed by an Almighty Employer that will supply us with the resources to complete our job, on time. We have a deadline. It's up to us to decide if we are willing to take the risk.

Recovery

I see the light at the end of the tunnel!!! I believe I am on my way to recovery from this sickness that I have had for over two weeks. This is my fourth day on antibiotics and at first I was worried because this morning was worse than yesterday. But my head doesn't feel like I have two freight trains slamming it from different directions. I can think!!! Yes! My cough, however, is not much better so I am praying that it will cease soon. The cough alone will me the death of me. Just Kidding. I am so happy about my head clearing that I had to blog my excitement.

He Gives Us Hope

Hebrews (Amplified)
18) This was so that, by two unchangeable things [His promise and His oath] in which it is impossible for God ever to prove false or deceive us, we who have fled [to Him] for refuge might have mighty indwelling strength and strong encouragement to grasp and hold fast the hope appointed for us and set before [us].
19) [Now] we have this [hope] as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul [it cannot slip and it cannot break down under whoever steps out upon it--a hope] that reaches farther and enters into [the very certainty of the Presence] within the veil,

Guesterize You Church

"Guesterizing your church occurs when you make guests the most important people at your church on Sunday morning. It means responding to their needs in a manner that causes them to enjoy their time with you. It means giving superior service so that they want to move beyond the first visit" -Gary L. McIntosh, Beyond the First Visit

I am not a writer. I like numbers, figures, formulas, logic! I like to know there is an answer at the end of that problem, even if the answer is infinite. So, writing has never come easy to me. I'd rather talk than write. I read an email I wrote when I first started at my job and I couldn't believe how horrible it was. My grammar was atrocious. I started every sentence with "I will".

My boss on the other hand can spit something out in a heartbeat. Seeing how easy it was to her, I asked her if writing has always been her strong point. She said she took a class in college about technical business writing. She had learned in the class that we need to write in a form that our reader can understand. Duh! You would think that would be so easy, but read some of the emails I get at work (including my own) and you'd be amazed.

Well, dealing with our guest has the same logic. Make them feel welcome in a way they understand. Have you been guesterized?

Joy

"For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning."

Psalm 30:5

1 Corinthian 6:19-20

What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.

A Word

If I may take this moment to have a word with you. It is almost 3:00 in the morning and I have been having personal time with God in prayer. I have tossed and turned all night after I went to bed sick, so I know there is a word that God wants me to share.

When I woke up in bed this morning, God told me to go pray. I pray in my front room which is why I had to "go" pray instead of get down and pray. Well, I didn't want to get out of bed. So I fought it. As I began to cover Anthony up (the nights are getting colder), Anthony in his sleep said "pray". Well if that is not a check in the spirit. So I have been praying.

In my time of prayer, God basically said to me to not worry when only a few people show up to prayer meeting. Think of this as a time for you to have better prayer. With more people there are distractions, when there are two or three you can get down to business.

God is not saying that unifed prayer with the whole church is not powerful, because it is. He is saying not to worry about others because He has a blessing for us and He is granting us the time in prayer with Him.

And the Fruit Tree Yields Fruit

“And God said let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth and it was so.” Genesis 1:11

“For every tree is known by his own fruit…” Luke 6:45


When I was growing up I had an apple tree and an orange tree. I can remember running around the fruit trees or waiting for the next fruit to fall. I remember thinking to myself that if only I could shake the tree the fruit would fall faster. I couldn't wait to see the fruit of that years yield.

My girlfriend has a lemon tree. I remember the first time that I went to pick some lemons and I pricked myself on the thorns. I had no clue that lemon trees had thorns. After she saw me cut myself up, she said one of the boys could get the lemons for me. I think she got a kick out of me looking so helpless. I know I did.

Either way, each tree had a fruit. Each tree yielded fruit of its own kind. I did not find apples on the lemon trees or lemons on the apple trees. The apples were on the apple tree and the apple tree yielded apples each year. The oranges were on the orange tree and that tree yielded oranges each year. The same goes for the lemons or any other fruit yielding tree.

The same also goes for people. Let’s say that the apple is a soul winner, the orange is a prayer warrior and the lemon tree is a gossiper. If each tree yields after is own kind, then the efforts of your yield will show in your harvest. The fruit of a soul winner will likely share the desire of the soul winner. It will have learned the importance of a fruitful yield after seeing year after year of sowing and reaping souls. The genetic make up of this person began with each outreach the parent took them on or each invite one friend saw another friend give. The importance of wining a soul was transcribed into their thinking with each yield. The prayer warrior began to genetically make up the fruit of their yield with each prayer, each moment of intercession, or each time they were seen on their knees crying out to God. Likewise, a gossiper was created with each new piece of gossip. Thorns were placed around the thoughts of that individual and a desire to prick or to hurt were yielded. Each fruit yields after its own kind.

We need fruits of all kinds because some fruit provides a powerful source that another may not contain. For example, a prayer warrior is most effective in prayer, but may not be as effective in giving a bible study. Or a soul winner feels most at ease when witnessing to someone on the street, but may not do as well in working the alter. Each fruit requires water and food to grow, and each fruit will provide you with some essential vitamins. But diversity brings strength and growth and a yield of different kinds. However, we must consciously yield the fruit of the Lord because the fruit of our efforts will yield a product that ends up looking like us.

Outreach

For those of you who do not know me well, I am terribly shy. I get really nervous when having to speak to people, but I make it a goal to do so. However, I will run wild if you let me loose to speak in front of a crowd. Crowds are less personable, therefore it is easier for me to mess up and move on rather than if I think I am going to be ridiculed in a small crowd (I know small crowds are not bad I just have a fear of small versus large). So on Direct Connect outreach today I was giving a card to a passerbyer and got nervous when the card got stuck. Eventually, after seconds of fumbling and messing things all up, I gave the card to the person. We looked at each other and laughed. He openly accepted the card.

Basically, I said all of that to say this. To be nervous is natural, no matter what end of the table you sit on, but don't let your nervousness turn into a fear that will hinder you from getting the job done. In the end, if may just be the mess you made that clears the path for someone else's salvation.

16% Rule

"Welcoming people is a never-ending process. Research completed in the late 1980s found that a church must keep about 16 percent of its first-time guests to experience a minimal growth rate of 5 percent a year...As an example, a church that wants to add fifty new members this year will need to have a minimum of three hundred guests attend its worship services during the year."

-Gary L. McIntosh, Beyond the First Visit

WOW! That was the 1980s. With all of the changes since then, wonder what the percent rule would be today? If you are not inviting guest, you better get on the ball. We need more than inviting...we need guest.

Going Against the Grain

For some reason, yesterday at work, the look of my nails began to bother me. So I pulled out my nail filer and began to manicure my nails. One side of the filer, files down the nail to shape it in the desired look. The other side smoothes the nail and gives it the finishing look. Today as I was in the car, I began to picture the nail filer and how it relates to spiritual growth. God, The Mega Nail Filer, goes against our grain to shape and mold, to file down the unnecessary and excess growth that only hinders our progress. He then takes this shaped product and applies the finishing touch.

Today praying in the car, God rebuked my thoughts. I thought I was doing something wrong, which is why things are not going right. It was almost like I was pleading with God to tell me what else I need to change in order to see progress. I couldn’t help but think that I was doing something wrong and that change would actually produce results. How totally wrong! Really fast, God shut those thoughts down. Change does produce results, but God showed me that you don’t have to be doing anything wrong when things stop going right. You could be in His perfect will and have everything stripped away (like Job in the Bible). But are you strong enough to withstand the fire? Are you strong enough to endure the period of filing?

When I was panicking because I thought I was doing something wrong, God was saying that progress is taking place. He is going against my grain, so that He can use me. In order to be used He must manicure me into the style that He fills is becoming on me. To look at this another way, He has taken me into the key store and is having me shaped into the key I need to be in order to unlock the door. The door is in front of me, but I cannot unlock the door if I, the Key, do not fit in the keyhole. Basically, God is making me into the person He has decided I need to be in order to reach out in the way He wants me to reach out. God has given us each different gifts. Where one excels at praying through at the altar, another stinks. Where one excels at witnessing to people on the street, another freezes up. My key does not always fit in another’s door and vice versa. My manicured style may not be a becoming style on another person’s hand, but it works for me.

But you know the wonderful thing about being filed down? Eventually we are finished. The rugged edges are smoothed out and eventually a well-manicured fingernail is presented or a perfectly fitted key is made and opens the door to progress. God is not always going against our grain even though this act will be repeated throughout our lives. Eventually, we are in the right size and shape and are just right for that time.

God is always in control and when we get out of control He will get out the filer and start filing down again. But we don’t have to be out of control when God decides to start filing. We may be in His perfect will when he decides to make a change in us. My desire is to be used of God, but how can he use me if I am out of shape? So, my prayer changed this morning. Instead of pleading with God to show me what I am doing wrong (which he did because my thoughts were all wrong) I began asking God to help me accept this change, to remain in His perfect will even when it goes against my grain, to bless my efforts with souls (because He will supply my needs), to strip away whatever is in my way and to shape me to fit where He wants me to fit. This is now my desire.

In A Haze

Bro McDaniel delivered another awesome message last night as our revival continued. He taught on revival and the steps required to have revival. In all my years in church (going on my five year anniversary next month) I have never felt revival so strongly as I have been feeling in the past couple of months. The "coincidental" is happening. This is what I call the “God just happened to…” time. As Bro McDaniel has been reminding us the last couple of nights, God cannot break His promise. “He just happened to” is God delivering on His promises. He said if we pray and fast He will provide. His presence is so powerful my worldly vision is blurred while my spiritual eyes are taking focus. There seems to be a haze when I walk around, but my thoughts are becoming so clear. I feel that God is trying to shift my focus from material things, worldly constraints, unnecessary burdens, etc. How else would I be able to do this if I cannot see or hear His will clearly?

Back-to-School Revival in the OC

Last night we had a Back-To School Revival service at out church. It was great. To see our church packed out with Saints from Fullerton, Colton and Moreno Valley, was a wonderful sight. Just to think, this is what it will look like every service when we ourselves begin to grow in numbers. I believe God is giving us a taste of what is yet to come.

DISTINGUISHED

I just came back from a Back to School revival service at Bro. David’s church in Colton. After an hour and 45 minute drive, I finally arrived there just in time for the preaching. The moment Bro McDaniel (the guest speaker for the service) began to preach I realized that there seems to be a centralized theme in all of the Back to School Rally’s I have been to in the past couple of weeks. The theme has been about taking the gospel to the whole world, reaching outside of the four walls of the church.

I went on the UPCI.org web site today and saw on the header “The Whole Gospel to the Whole World by the Whole Church”. Bro Rutledge who was down here from Alexandria, LA preached about getting out of the factory and into the delivery truck, sharing the Bread of Life with others. Bro McDaniel, who spoke tonight, talked about letting God in so that you can take God out to others.

As Bro McDaniel said tonight, the devil is okay with us containing The Word inside of the church. The devil is saying go ahead and live this life so long as we don’t share it with others. He wants us like a contained fire, under control, of little threat. But we should not be as a contained fire, but a wildfire, spreading the word. He is absolutely correct. The devil seeks to devour because his destiny is already determined. We need to devour that which seeks to devour us. Spread the Word. The more wild and out of control we become, the more threatened and defeated the devil is. Like Bro Rutledge said in his “Divine Rythm” sermon, the world has no pride, therefore we need not have pride when it comes down to sharing the Word with them.

As I was driving home tonight, the word “Distinguished” kept popping up in my head. A distinguished fire is not a fire, but a charred place that was once aflame. Has your fire gone out, has it been distinguished by the trial or maybe contained by the circumstances? Did you try to make a difference in another’s life or were you simply satisfied with the difference that was made in you. Are you distinguished or are you aflame???

What is There to Worry About?

"I believe God is managing affairs and the He doesn't need any advice from me. With God in charge, I believe that everything will work out for the best in the end. So what is there to worry about?" -Henry Ford

Love Languages of a Single Parent - Words of Affirmation

“While the world is crumbling and fear has paralyzed many hearts, let not fashion, materialism and superficial activity give false hope or take the place of that which is important, but let passionate prayers of repentance and intercession be uttered. It is imperative that people pray heaven-directed, earth-shaking prayers, so that we might be granted divine mercy and be delivered from the stagnation of apathy, while our generation trudges blindly into the blackness of violence and hell.” – Joy Haney

You might be wondering how this quotation and the love language of words of affirmation have a connection. Trust me, this was not what I had intended to write. I got stuck and couldn’t figure out what to say. When I read this in her book “Healing Power of Prayer” I immediately knew what I wanted to say in this blog.

Prayer is the most priceless gift and affirmation of love you can give. Words are spoken and delivered to the Almighty One who in turn works His ways. We need to hear the words I love you, but there is no greater affirmation than to hear the words, I am praying for you. You ask how does prayer say I love you? Simple.

• Can you pray about someone you dislike? Yes, but would it be genuine. And even then, would you tell them I am praying for you or would you simply ignore them as you probably have already been doing.
• Prayer shapes the heart: As I stated above, you can’t genuinely pray for someone you dislike. Even if you disliked them at one point, if you continue to pray for them, the insincerity turns into genuine compassion and concern. What use to be out of routine begins to happen out of love and caring.
• Your fervent prayers allows God to enter onto the scene: Prayer is the channel of connectivity from God to you and you to God. If you are fervently praying, you have opened up the gate for God to come in, and created the opportunity for you to live Christ-like. When your life mirrors the will of God, then you are able to forgive when its hard to forget, to give even if you don’t receive, to love when you don’t feel loved and much more. You learn to love unconditionally.
• Prayer helps you to be positive: If you pray shallow prayers, your words will likewise be shallow. The matters of the heart will reveal themselves through prayer. Praying for miracles, praying for blessings, and praying for the miraculous requires faith. Faith is the offspring of positive thinking, believing it can happen. “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” (Hebrews 11:1).
• Prayer helps you to see the strengths and not the weaknesses of an individual: We want to pray for the strengthening of a person’s weakness, but you wouldn’t be praying for them if you didn’t see their strengths. When you focus on a person’s weaknesses, you begin to develop sinful thoughts. You nit-pick at this and that while neglecting to see what they bring in your life. Prayer helps you to focus on the blessing they have become instead of the nuisance you thought they were. It helps you to see what they can become instead of what they were.

Prayer is the first step and the most important. The second is to live with thankfulness in your heart. When you are thankful and “prayed up” it is easier for you to give without demeaning. What do I mean by that? Too often we conditionally love people. “I love you but…” you fill in the blank. “That was great but…” If you were to sit and think about how often we hear and say such things, you’d be surprised. The recipient of such love would begin to wonder if they ever do anything right, it they are ever good enough, or if they are even loved. Stop! Stop! Stop! No more “buts” when you dish out an “I love you” or a compliment. Just do it. Just give the compliment. Just say I love you and no more. Constant correction equates to conditional love.

As a single parent, how does this affect us? We heavily rely on our friends and family to fill in the gaps that may not be filled to often. Additionally, we heavily reply on God to keep us balanced. When we lay down at might and begin to reflect on the day, He is our companion. When our feelings get hurt, He is the objective thinker when we take things out of proportion. When we feel ugly He’s the one showing us that we are beautiful. And just think about it, He might have used you to show it. Thank you for that compliment on how I looked today. Thank you for saying I love you. It’s okay to say, I’m praying for you. Thank you, we need it.

Love Languages of a Single Parent - Physical Touch

Physical touch is a language that crosses all colors, any language, any race, ethnicity or culture. A quick embrace can say I love you, or a pat on the back can say “good job”. The language of physical touch is powerful which is why the amount that we do or don’t touch can make or break relationships.

So in the middle of my reading, I began to think about the relation of single parents and physical touch. How does a single parent who is living for God give and receive physical touch without crossing the boundaries of the flesh and enter into lustful temptations? As a single parent, will I ever be able to fill my emotional tank from someone other than my child? Will that need ever be able to be fulfilled while I wait for matrimonial bliss, if this is the path that I will eventually take? I have at times wondered, do the wedded or never married understand the physical trials we [single parents] face?

Yes, yes, yes! Though at times things seem out of sorts and unfulfilling, there is a way. I have thought on this, battled with this, and finally relinquished the burden of it to God. For you who speak the language of physical touch, you too can fill your emotional tank. Here is how.

For the Singles/Never Married/Once Married/etc:
This may sound unrealistic, but in all reality the first place you need to look to is God and not to man. GOD IS OMNIPRESENT. He is there when you need Him. You need a hug, ask Him. You need physical comforting, ask Him. I’m not playing. Yes, He is a spirit, but He also once came down and manifested Himself into man. He fully understands the needs of physical touch. He experienced the beauty of a mother’s touch, or a father’s pat on the back. He knows about the bedtime stories and cuddling. Outside of the parental touch, I’m sure He at one point was tempted by flesh. The bible says that Jesus was not appealing to the eyes, but I bet that some woman found him appealing. Really, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, attraction does not always stem from looks, but from power, authority and a demanding appeal. He had all of those, even to the unbeliever. He never sinned, you never hear about His disciples dealing with lust. They focused on God and the kingdom of heaven, instead of the advances of women. That’s what we must do even when it seems impossible, Keep Your Eyes on God. By staying focused your physical desires can be fulfilled through the Spirit.

Have you ever been praying and felt a strong presence of the Lord? It’s almost
like someone is right there with you. I have. There have been several times when
I have been praying and I feel the warmth of loving arms surrounding me. It is
so real, I have opened my eyes expecting to see someone only to see nothing.
Faith is the substance of things hoped for, evidence of things not seen (Hebrews
11:1). I could not see Him by sight, but I could feel him by faith. It was at
these moments my battles were won. He touched me, I know he touched me, and oh
the joy that floods my soul.

God understands what we need and when we need it. He knew that I needed a hug and not a pat on the back. He knew I needed to feel secure and only the language of physical touch could provide that sense of security and love that I was seeking. He knows and He can provide. So, ask Him and see what He can do for you.

For the fellow church family:
You are awesome. You know why? Because we pray together. Do you know that we are filling love tanks when we pray together? Ladies, when we join together as one or even just jointly pray we are communicating love through the language of physical touch? I can’t say how many times, I was going through the “unloved” stage of being single and really wanting just a hug, when one of you would come put your arms around me and pray with me. All I wanted was affirmation and you provided it through the simple act of prayer. You were an answer to prayer. This is one thing that made me fall in love with this church as well as Pentecost. The friendliness, the sensitivity to the needs of others is evident daily. Sometimes a hug or a touch to the arm are the only words that need to be spoken. So, when you see someone praying alone, unite with them, because you are not only unifying in the spirit, but are providing love, through an unspoken language that can speak louder than words.

Crossing Boundaries:
As for crossing boundaries, all I can say is, if you live in the flesh, you will cross boundaries. If you live with the Spirit in you, the issue of flesh will seem like an anthill and not a mountain. Flesh should not have dominion over you, and if it does then the Spirit cannot. This is not easy when we are surrounded by flesh and lots of it pretty much everywhere we go. This country particularly lives by the “Sex sells” philosophy. Its pretty sad when restaurants think the only way to sell a burger is by putting a woman in a bikini in the advertisement. They know that what appeals to the eyes will ignite physical desires whether this is eating a burger or drinking a soda. So don’t let your flesh have control over you, but keep control of your flesh and you will remain within the physical boundaries and be able to benefit from the language of physical touch.

Ultimately, my need for physical touch has been fulfilled. I still battle with the “unloved” stage every now and then. Those are the times when I am giving more hugs, because I want some in return. Those are the times, I go pray with others even more because my temptations are being conquered by giving to others what I want done to me. Do unto others as you wish them to do unto you. Sometimes you have to give in order to receive. Its okay to have needs, we are human, but sometimes you have to let others know what your need are so that they don’t waste time in trying to guess and possibly miss your hints all together.

Stay tuned for more on
the Love Languages of a
Single Parent...

The Love Language of a Single Parent - Introduction

I have been reading The Five Love Languages of Children, a book written by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell. The book is exactly about the what the title says, the love languages of children. I have to say that it is an exceptional read, especially for those parents who have no idea what happened to that once loveable, outgoing child.

I think as parents we often don't realize what changes our children go through and how sensitive they are to their surroundings and anything that threatens to alter it. We equate everything to the "phase" that they are going through, when it might simply be a cry out for love.

So, this got me to thinking...I as an adult have often cried out, even when I didn't realize that I was doing it. I too have gone through phases, my most memorable being postpartem depression, but there are things that I battle with still today. If I was to examine my love language I would have to say that at that time, my tank is not quite full. But I know where I can fill up.

So, starting tomorrow, I will begin my 5-day blog on the five love languages of a young single parent (Since I am one). Each day I will examine one love language and discuss what a single parent might think when the tank is empty and when the tank is full. Tomorrow, I will begin with the language of physical touch.

Stay tunned for more....

Six Foot and Proud

Today, I wore flat shoes, which is a rarity for me. Though I stand 6’ tall, I love to wear heels and have no quarrels about it at all. I realized that I must be "giganta" woman when I am in my heels because today I wasn’t towering over my coworkers as I normally do. So when I received numerous stares and comments on not wearing heels I instantly thought to an article that I read in Shape Magazine. It was nothing big, but just some quotes on things that have made people feel good. One woman was tall and made the comment that although she towers at 6’1", she loves to wear heels to show the world what an "amazon" women she is. This made me laugh because I do notice that when I get off the platform from praise singing that my microphone normally stands a foot higher than all the rest. I don’t dress this way for attention, I purely do it because I love heels and feel bare without them. God made me tall, and I will love every inch because that’s what He wanted me to be. God made us in the form he liked best for us, don’t try to be something that you are not, but love what you are.

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them." (Genesis 1:27)

What Have You Done for Me Lately?

I can only classify yesterday as "Unforgettable". The title that I have used came to mind during the morning preaching. Pastor Pryor taught on commitment. It was one of those sermons where the finger is not pointed at you but you couldn’t help but feel like it was directly meant for you. I know I am not the only one, which is why I can freely say this, but the sermon was one of those were you can hardly breathe because you know in some way that you have not followed through, you have not committed where you should have.

I couldn’t help but think how uncommitted this world really is. I know there is war going on between religious sects across the seas and we think it is ridiculous to be so committed to the point where you are blinded from any sanity and reasoning. Well I give those religious sects one thing, they are committed to their cause, no matter how silly we think that cause might be.

It made me think, are we as Americans laughing so hard because of our own fear of commitment? The average time for someone to be in one job is 2 years. I know from experience that when I went to work for my current company, it amazed me to find people who had been working here for more than two years. I was so use to people just getting up and going when they no longer liked it. The employers as well. We see lay-off after lay-off only for the position to be reopened after one year. Do they or do they not need the help?

The divorce rate has gone up, kids are even divorcing their parents. The percentage of single parents has increased, not just from divorced situations, but for kids born out of wedlock. Children are wanted, just not when a marriage is involved. Where is the commitment?

I am definitely guilty for having commitment issues. Because as I was hearing the sermon, the phrase "what have you done for me lately" just kept going through my head. Then I began to see "what have I done for you lately". Commitment is so difficult these days because we are so consumed with the "what have you done for me" attitude and not enough of the "what can I do for you" mentality. Humbleness is a thing of the past, and when you are humble it seen as a sign of weakness. But is it really weakness? No, it is purely humbleness, a likeness of Jesus.

To continue back on yesterday, this awesome sermon was then followed by the powerful testimony by my youth leaders, Frank & Sabrina Peavey, who God has blessed over and over and whom God uses to show us that we too can be blessed. I have received a blessing just watching them over the years. Followed by this testimony was a powerful (I can’t think of the word)…piece (I guess this is the best word) of a 9-year old girl praying. I had seen this before, but God specifically orchestrated the Peavey’s blessing to occur before this Edge service. It made the service even more powerful. You can’t see this video without tearing up and feeling outdone by a 9-year old. As Bro Frank said it in his sermon, I don’t know many adults to even pray like that.

So from all of this I just want to say:

• God, you never fail to make each day better than the last. You are awesome and worthy of every single praise.
  
• Pastor Pryor, your sermon was excellent. The evangelist in you began peeking through and cut right to business. I needed that more than I even realized.
  
• Bro Frank and Sis Sabrina, You Go Guys! You opened up your home to be used by God’s people and God decided it was time to get you a new one (so to speak). The way I see it, this calls for another house warming. AMEN!
  

Sky High

During my time in Seattle, I had the pleasure of eating at the Space Needle. If you haven't been to Seattle, the Space Needle is basically their landmark (other than rain) and stands over 600 feet above ground. At the top of the needle sits the dinning room which makes a 360 degree rotation about every hour. It's amazing. I love heights, there is something about being above it all that gives me a thrill. Though you cannot always live at the top, there are moments when we can be on top of the clouds and just enjoy being sky high.

Alaska

Just came back from my Alaskan cruise and must say that it was refreshing and "a sight for sore eyes". There is nothing like being able to while watch whales while savoring the sweet taste of their ocean buddies, the salmon and escargot. Who would of thought that ocean life could be so fun.

I must also say that all the hype is true. There is nothing like the experience of Alaska. Yes, here you can fall in love with God over and over again. No, it doesn’t make me want to move there, but it surely puts something in prospective. God! How can people deny God when an ocean so grand surrounds you for miles and miles? How can they say there is no God when you are looking into a glacier with a color so blue no Crayola crayon could ever match it? How can they say He is not there when you are flying through hurricanes and your head feels like it is spinning 100 mph but you can still wake up in the morning in tack and with a sound mind? No wonder they aren’t happy. They’ve never been to Alaska.

The "Inner" Circle

Since I was young, I’ve never be able to easily meet people. I was a shy girl and still am to a degree. In some ways I have adjusted because you simply cannot enjoy life sheltered away from people and seclusion is very unhealthy. Secluded is exactly what I would be if I was to keep on the track I was going when I was younger. In high school I purposely avoided hanging out with my older sister because she was in the "in crowd". I couldn’t stand all of the attention so I never entered into their "Inner" circle and they never entered into mine.

What a world of difference aging can make. It is unreasonable to avoid people simply because of personality difference or because of a character flaw of our own making. The "inner" circle is no fun when there is no one in it but you. God surely doesn’t share his circle with Himself, but he has accepted so many different people into His "inner" courts. Yes, we have those that we simply get along with, but we should still be able to hang out with others. It simply means that you have no inner circle, but you have close friends.

So, when someone new steps into church or into the office, befriend them. They are the freshmen in this school of learning. They need the acceptance and belonging not seclusion. Break down the walls and put out the welcome sign "Join us Friend."

It's Contagious

Don’t you just love Monday’s. No, it’s not because I get to end my short-lived weekend or because I just love the stress of work life, but it’s almost like another opportunity to start over. We have the opportunity to correct what might have been wrong the past week or we might simply be one step closer to that "thing" we’ve been waiting for.

At work today, there was such an excitement in the air. It all began with one person sharing in the blessings of another and so forth. Celebrations taking place for nothing of significance, but for something that was made to be exciting. A positive productive atmosphere was created from the exciting power of laughter! It’s contagious and something worth catching.

Refresh

Okay, I was cruising on the information highway looking for something in particular (can’t remember what I was looking for because this happened more than once) when all of a sudden the screen pauses. Bam! All I get are fragments of a page. I’m road blocked from reaching my destination. So what do I do? I hit refresh. I don’t want to go backwards, but I want to renew or revive the image on that present screen. Sometimes, don’t you just feel like hitting the refresh button in your life? You don’t want to start over or even go backwards, you just want a little reviving in your spirit. You just need to fill up again and keep going. I know I do. So this is what I’m going to do. I’m going to take a pause in this display screen called life, put down the phone, jump off the computer and take a moment to just REFRESH. Talk to ya tomorrow. Good Night.

Tip of The Week

Learn something new everyday.

Today I learned about Boanerges. I came across this during my internet reading. See Robbymac.org. According to Dictionary.com this means sons of thunder, a surname given by our Lord to James and John (Mark 3:17) on account of their fervid and impetuous temper (Luke 9:54). Prior to their spiritual maturity, James and John could be known as Boanerges. We definitely do not remember them as such.

It’s wonderful how God’s presence in a person’s life can be so evident in their character. As a teenager, I was once classified as "The Black Heart." I was brutally honest and at times (well many times) just flat out cold hearted. I can’t say that I am not brutally honest at times in my adult life, but I am definitely not known for it any longer. I have people asking me if I ever get angry. Now, they obviously do not spend much time with me because I still have to work out some of that road rage (all part of living in California), but there has been a change since I’ve allowed God to step into my life and take control.

As Robbymac put it, "What kind of a man [woman] do I want to be known as? Boanerges or the apostle of love?"

Soul Searching is Relevant to Spreading The Gospel

"There is a difference between making the Gospel relevant, and trying to make it suitable to culture. Relevant means that we discard the baggage that we have attached to the Gospel--such as theological jargon--so that our message can be better understood. Suitable is when we try to make the Gospel another positive thinking, get rich scheme which has all too often been the case with many North American churches."

I read this on Brian Leport's blog and it immediately struck out at me. He was summarizing an interview with Donald Miller who speaks on "hip" the Gospel. This instantly caught my eye because it is something that has constantly been on my mind. How do I capture the young adult crowd without them thinking I have lost touch with the times? How do I show them that what mom and pops believed actually works for us without being seen as an "old woman"? With my more serious nature, how can I show them that I have way more fun now than I ever did before, and its not because I’m serious but because it is simply enjoyable?

First of all, it took and is still taking some soul searching. I am always considered the older sibling when I hang out with my older sister. I can’t stand that. So, obviously there is something I needed to adjust in my life that would break me out of this old hag phase and back into the times when I could be the younger sister. This required and still requires much work, but the change is awesome. It is also an outreach tool for younger crowds. I am one of them and not an outsider.

Secondly, I am learning how to bring The Word to them in relevant terms. For instance, I would not go speak in my 5-year old son’s classroom using the vocabulary I would use at work. This is the age when story time is peak hour and animation will make you their best friend. Even a walk to the store can be a fun filled story when I bring it to their terms. So relevance is right on point, when spreading the Gospel. You have to think about who you are talking to, where you are, how you met them, etc. Analyze before you react. This way you can become proactive instead of dreadfully reactive.

I know there are many more points to touch on, but these are the two I have been working hard to develop. To reach a certain audience takes research and dedication. It takes adjustment where necessary and complete change when something is completely broken. It is not easy to evaluate yourself so seek the advice of others. I think my friends have been wondering about me because of all the questions I am asking about myself. Someone has even asked if I have been reading those self help books. I laugh because I believe this is self help that is relevant to spreading The Gospel. My way of discarding the baggage that has made my approach irrelevant. It took soul searching, soul breaking and soul shaping in order to begin in the direction I am seeking and what I believe God has given to me.

Where Did God's Burden Go?

Where did God’s burden go?
Was it devoured up by the beastly appetite of lust and deceit?
Did it fall on the stony hills of rejection and defeat?
Did it wither away with the scorching rays of pride and neglect?
Or did it get blown away by a disease with a simple name called “Forget”?

Did it get cast down or put aside, and forgotten as the days went by?
Did it drown in the depths of selfishness?
Or was it lost in the pits of self-righteousness?
It can’t simply be left and expected to progress.
Because it’s life and it is required to be fed.

So as you sit, take the moment to reflect
Do you know, where did God’s burden go?


God gave us the ability to give. To give in prayer, in fasting to give when we may never receive, to give our best when we don’t want to. Fortunately, God gave us a burden. When I have a burden for someone or something, I find that my prayers are more fervent, my desire is increased and my faith strengthened. It’s the burden that magnifies my belief when we’re against all odds. It’s that burden that keeps me going when my body is weak or my mind is tired. It’s the burden that puts me on my knees in prayer when my body aches. It’s the same burden that heals the weak and mends the broken. It’s the same burden that picks me up when the day drags on. It’s the burden of a mother for her child, the child for a parent, a house for a family, a friend for a friend. It’s the same burden that brought me into church, the cleansed my soul and granted me forgiveness when I was unworthy. It’s the burden that directs souls to a loving God. It’s God’s burden living in us all and fed by prayer.

Mother's Day

Ruth 1:16
And Ruth said, Intreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God

As a single Mother, Mother’s Day normally leans more towards an average day. Since my son is young and still very dependent upon me, any events planned are planned by me. This Mother’s Day, I have been truly blessed with a wonderful eventful weekend. As Sister Terry has said, I’ve been emotional this weekend. The reason is because I realized, that although I have gone many Mother’s Day without a mother, I have the opportunity to make each Mother’s Day special with my son and adopted “niece and nephew”. These years are my second chance to give what I didn’t have and I thank God for such a blessing.

To all of the single mothers and all of the women who have lost their mother’s, I wish you a wonderful Mother’s Day.

To all of the women who have taken the time to teach me and guide me and love me, I love you and hope your day was even more blessed than mine.

To Sister Pryor, Happy First Mother’s Day in Orange County. Anthony and I appreciate you and love you.

Speechless

"Occasionally in life there are those moments of unutterable fulfillment which cannot be completely explained by those symbols called words. Their meanings can only be articulated by the inaudible language of the heart." -Martin Luther King

Miracle Living

There are two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
-Albert Einstein

Do you think this is Reality thinking vs. Dreaming or Optimism vs. Pessimism?
We don’t have to give up dreaming to accomplish what is reality, but you do have to stay optimistic to accomplish a dream. You must see the vision before you can live it and you must believe it in order to achieve it. I don’t konw anyone that said it could never happen and then went out and made it happen. I do know many people who dreamed a vision, remained optimistic when reality said it wasn’t permissible, and accomplished the dream. With God everything is possible even when it is humanly impossible. Just remember that He is the Miracle Worker and everyday we live a miracle.

I'm Off

I’m off to my piano lessons today. The lessons have become more regular now, which is always a plus. Today, I am really excited about my lessons because I have a new song that I would like to learn for our next Edge service. I already have some songs lined up, but piano is always more exciting when there is a new song to be learned. Kind of reminds me of faith, its usually more exciting when you learn something new. Practicing the fundamentals can become repetitive, but
it is refreshing when this dedication and commitment allows me to build upon my faith by freeing up time to learn something new and exciting.

Bringing Home The Church

I read something interesting today about spiritual disconnectedness. In "Are We Too Disconnected" the following was written:

"About half or more than half of the believers DO NOT attend a church service on Sunday." The fact is, the majority of these people are probably not connecting with what we might call a consistent spiritual community…Their most significant communal rhythms happen through a number of separate events and occasions in homes, coffee shops, clubs, festivals, etc. And in the past 7 years, the internet has become another of those places where spiritual gifts are shared and the accountability of relationship is maintained despite physical distance."

Though I am not in agreement with everything that is said in this blog, because God gave us a pastor after his own heart (Jeremiah 3:15), I do agree that there is a steadily increasing stream of disconnection taking place. In our efforts to adapt to change we have provided a very easy way for people to adapt in church without physically being in a church. We have brought church home with us, and many decided to keep it there.

Yes, we need to be able to find God even in our homes, in the coffeehouses or on the internet. However, I the intentions were never to replace the church house, but to allow a way for people to be connected when there was no other way. It was more of a ‘if they can’t come to us, then we’ll come to them’ approach. It was not intended as an option, but as the last resort.

Consequently, we have developed "Personal Christianity". Today is the "feel good" era. If it doesn’t feel right, then don’t do it. That mentality has seeped its way into the Christian hearts and convoluted the purpose of God’s joy. God gave laws, he reprimanded when they were broken and rewarded when they were kept. Man did not make them, but God did. Today we dangerously titer-tot on the fine line of God’s ways and our ways, His church or ours. Most of the time we sit and hang out on the "Our Ways" side without ever finding our way to His side. Ultimately, this has made the church into the enemy instead of the ally. God never intended for man to be alone, physically or spiritually. He would have never created Eve if this were the case. He would have created unreproductable creatures that would die on the very same lot on which they were created.

We all need church. It’s not the building that is important, but the spiritual support as well as the physical support. However, we must continue with global outreach in order to provide the support to those who are unable to find it elsewhere. I don’t care if church is held outside or in, but I do care for its presence and the fact that it is serving the purpose for which God intended: a founding structure, a support haven, a house of refuge, a house of joy, a house of learning, and a house of growth. It’s The House of God.

Awesome are Your Ways

Lord, awesome are your ways. You knew Lord what I needed to hear. When I asked I did received. To think that just a few words could be the blessing I was looking for. You used one person's weakness and anothers strength to create an equilibrium; the balance of a world that was unevenly shaped. You are awesome.

Amen

This Isn't the End, This is Only The Beginning

A blessing from the Lord is here! In the last two weeks we have experienced wonderful services. We have been able to participate in the Azusa Street Centennial Services. My home church has continued with the spirit of revival and has been blessed with a wonderful move of God. We've been on the move, God has been on the move, and it has been such a blessing. After all is said and done, our momentum continues even though we physically begin to decelerate. This is not the end of revival, this is only the beginning. Hallelujah!

Hope

"Hope…, unlike optimism, is independent of people's circumstances. Hope is not based on the possibilities of the situation and on correct extropolation about the future. Hope is grounded in the faithfulness of God and therefore on the effectiveness of God's promise...it is the future that comes not from the realm of what is or what was, but from the realm of what is not yet...Optimism is based on the possibilities of things as they have come to be; hope is based on the possibilities of God irrespective of how things are. Hope can spring up even in the valley of the shadow of death; indeed, it is there that it becomes truly manifest." - Miroslav Volf

Praise Ye the Lord

Psalms 150
1Praise ye the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary: praise him in the firmament of his power.
2Praise him for his mighty acts: praise him according to his excellent greatness.
3Praise him with the sound of the trumpet: praise him with the psaltery and harp.
4Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments and organs.
5Praise him upon the loud cymbals: praise him upon the high sounding cymbals.
6Let every thing that hath breath praise the LORD. Praise ye the LORD.

A Soldier In God's Army

I sang a song not too long ago that I heard from our ladies conference about not letting the devil drive with you. The speaker noted that when she was a little girl, her mother never allowed her to hate anything. My father was the same way. "Hate" was too strong a word so I could say that I disliked something, but never "hate". But there is one thing we can hate, that’s the devil. I’ve come to realize that if I don’t hate him, then I must in some way support him. Since I can never trust him, than why should I stand on his side. I cannot seem to shake this image, but I keep thinking about how the devil hates me because I live for God. Every time I give thanks to God, I imagine a black eye to the devil. Every time I give praise or worship to God, I imagine a kick to the shin. Every time I tell the Lord how much I love him, I can imagine the heart attack that the devil receives when he hears me (that’s right, the devil doesn’t have a heart). Basically, if I am not against the devil, then I am for him. His fate is already decided. In Luke 10:18 it says "I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven." His fate is already decided, there is no way I will let him decide mine too. I will keep fighting with praise, with prayer, with worship and most importantly through God. I will keep spreading the word and testifying of God’s goodness. God will win every time.

Thinking on the Positive

I’m a morning person. When I wake up, my mind automatically begins to shift into gear. At night, I am quite opposite. My mind begins to hibernate. I am easily distracted unless I totally submerge myself in a calm quiet environment. Over the last couple of years I have learned to adapt because my son is quite opposite of me. He is groggy in the morning and totally awake at night. So one thing I have learned to do is to think in the morning, ponder on those thoughts throughout the day and wrap everything up at night. I have cycled my thinking process so that I give myself my best work environment when I am at my best.

This is why it is important that I begin the introduction to and conclude my day with positive thoughts. What I do in the morning and at night influence my thoughts and actions throughout the day. If I end my day with negative thoughts, I wake up with them. If I start my day with negative thoughts, my behavior will be reflective of those thoughts throughout my day. So it is important that I keep thinking on the positive because influences and consequences of negativity is just not worth it.

Don't Consult the Experts, Consult The Expert

"If you want to achieve something, give yourself permission to believe it is possible-no matter what experts might say." – John C. Maxwell

"Never tell a young person that something cannot be done. God may have been waiting centuries for somebody ignorant enough of the impossible to do that thing." – John Andrew Holmes


Azusa Street 1906:

The experts said it was nothing of importance. The experts said it wasn’t even worth mentioning.

"We made no mention of the matter in the Messenger, not deeming it of sufficient importance to demand attention from outsiders…Locally it is of small account, being insignificant both in numbers and influence. Instead of being the greatest movement of the times…it is of small moment. It has had, and has now, upon the religious life of the city, about as much influence as a pebble thrown into the sea." – Nazarene Messenger, December 13, 1906

They made it out to be like a beast in the night.

"Night is made hideous in the neighborhood by the howlings of the worshippers who spend hours swaying forth and back in a nerve-racking attitude of prayer and supplication." – Los Angeles Times, April 18, 1906

The "ignorant" ones believed.

"The meetings in Los Angeles started in a cottage meeting, and the Pentecost fell there three nights. The People had nothing to do but wait on the Lord and praise Him… Many churches have been praying for Pentecost…" - Azusa Street Mission Newspaper, September 1906

And The Expert said well done!

"The great Shekina glory is still resting upon us as a pillar of fire by night and a pillar of cloud by day, where hundreds and thousands of souls have come and been blest through the mighty power of our blessed Lord. Hungry and thirsty souls are coming from hundreds and thousands of miles to get their personal Pentecost, and receiving and taking the glad tidings back home to hungry and thirsty souls that are waiting their arrival." – Azusa Street Mission Newspaper, December 1906

"Waves of Pentecostal salvation are still rolling in at Azusa Street Mission. From morning till late at night the meetings continue with about three alter services a day…The fire is spreading." – Azusa Street Mission Newspaper, October, 1906

And the fire still falls!
2006

"Azusa Street was the seminal revival of modern Pentecostalism." – www.firestillfalls.com

"Prominent theologians consider Azusa Street ‘the birthplace of the modern Pentecostal movement,’ " –www.christianpost.com

"Pentecostalism has earlier roots, but the Azusa Street Revival launched it as a worldwide movement." – www.wikipedia.org

Who will you believe?

The Days of Pentecost

The Day of Pentecost

“And when the day of Pentecost was fully come, they were all with one accord in one place. And suddenly there came a sound from heaven as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled all the house where they were sitting. And there appeared unto them cloven tongues like as of fire, and it sat upon each of them. And they were all filled with the Holy Ghost, and began to speak with other tongues, as the Spirit gave them utterance.” (Acts 2:1-4)


The Days of Pentecost, 1906

“GOOD NEWS SPREADS.
People from all over the country are sending in letters of inquiry, having heard that Pentecost has come to Los Angeles. Some have come long distances and report that the half had not been told them. Through this paper we answer inquiries, as it would be impossible to write to each. Souls are hungry all over the land.”

Reports of the Spirit Moving
“The power of God now has this city agitated as never before. Pentecost has surely come and with it the Bible evidences are following, many being converted and sanctified and filled with the Holy Ghost, speaking in tongues as they did on the day of Pentecost. The scenes that are daily enacted in the building on Azusa street and at Missions and Churches in other parts of the city are beyond description, and the real revival has only started, as God has been working with His children mostly, getting them through to Pentecost, and laying the foundation for a mighty wave of salvation among the unconverted.”

Reports of Healing
“Many have laid aside their glasses and had their eye sight perfectly restored. The deaf have had their hearing restored.”

“A man was healed of asthma of twenty years standing. Many have been healed of heart trouble and lung trouble.”

“Canes, crutches, medicine bottles, and glasses are being thrown aside as God heals. That is the safe way. No need to keep an old crutch or medicine bottle of any kind around after God heals you. Some, in keeping some such appliance as a souvenir, have been tempted to use them again and have lost their healing.”

Reports of Deliverance
“A brother who had been a spiritualist medium and who was so possessed with demons that he had no rest, and was on the point of committing suicide, was instantly delivered of demon power. He then sought God for the pardon of his sins and sanctification, and is now filled with a different spirit.”

Reports of the Holy Ghost Infilling
“About 160 people in Los Angeles, more than on the day of Pentecost, have received the gift of the Holy Ghost and the Bible evidence, the gift of tongues, and many have been saved and sanctified, nobody knows how many. People are seeking at the altar three times a day and it is hard to close at night on account of seekers and those who are under the power of God.”

“In about an hour and a half, a young man was converted, sanctified,and baptized with the Holy Ghost, and spoke with tongues. He was also healed from consumption, so that when he visited the doctor he pronounced his lungs sound. He has received many tongues, also the gift of prophecy, and writing in a number of foreign languages, and has a call to a foreign field.”

“Bro. Campbell, a Nazarene brother, 83 years of age, who had been for 53 years serving the Lord, received the baptism with the Holy Ghost and gift of tongues in his own home. His son, who was a physician, was called and came to see if he was sick, but found him only happy in the Lord. Not only old men and old women, but, boys and girls, are receiving their Pentecost. Viola Price, a little orphan colored girl eight years of age, has received the gift of tongues.”


The Day of Pentecost 2006

It’s time for another break through!

"Opportunity once passed,” said Frank Bartleman, “is lost forever. There is a time when the tide is sweeping by our door. We may plunge in and be carried to glorious success and blessing and victory. To stand on the bank shivering from timidity, or paralyzed by stupor at such a time is to miss all, and most miserably and eternally fail. Oh, our responsibility! The mighty tide of God's grace and favor even now is sweeping by us, in its prayer directed course." -Frank Bartleman


The above quotes were taken from the September 1906 issue of the “The Apostolic Faith Movement“ found on www.sendrevival.com.

Believe

“People who embrace possibility thinking are capable of accomplishing task that seem impossible because they believe in solutions.” – John C. Maxwell

To receive the impossible is never impossible when you are believing in the power of God. Just like eating and drinking, it is a concept we have incoporated into our daily lives. When you go to sleep at night, you are believing that you will wake up in the morning. Yet, no day is guaranteed. When you drive to work, you fail to think that you are not going to make it unless danger comes in the form of a possible accident. Otherwise, you get to work just like you expected. When you open your mouth to talk, you expect words to come out like they do every other day. Everyday we exercise the concept of believing. Believing that God will provide. Imagine what would happen if we take this form of believing, this form of expectancy and applied it to our goals and visions. Imagine the accomplishments that would be achieved when our believing exceeds our own capabilities. Possibilities are endless when we rely on the One who made it all possible. To not receive would be unexpected.

Pushing Through

Sometimes in life it seems like we hit a brick wall. Things do not have to go wrong or right, but we just get stuck. It is like when you are cleaning your house and you take a break. As we all know, once you take a break, it is hard to get started again, if you do get started again. When you finally do start, you have to push yourself to complete the job. Spiritually, I believe we sometimes hit a brick wall. We get stuck because we took a break and got sidetracked. Physically we do need a break, but spiritually we cannot afford one. When you feel like you have given all that you have, you have to keep pushing until you break through. Just remember that what you can’t do or when you have given your all God is there to step in to do what you couldn’t or provide you with the strength to keep going. He’ll never give us more than what we can handle. Just keep pushing and pushing until the Mary-go-round of life picks up in speed and spins with God’s hands.

Thank You!

Thank you everyone for making this day extra special for Anthony. He had a wonderful time at the birthday party despite the windy conditions. He's been partying from sun up until the bouncer went down. In his words, this day was "sweet." Love Ya'll.

In My Weakness He is Made Strong

"And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me." (2 Corinthians 12:9)

When I have given my all, He provides. What I can't do, He can do.

Confidence Building

My boss just went on vacation for about 3 weeks. So in preparation for her absence, she began to set-up some time with me in order to see where I'm at in my projects. Instead, she decided to not set-up time, but said "Philana, I trust you. You already know what to do. You know the answer before you even come to me." She was right. I usually know the answer but I doubt myself. I don't want to be wrong so I check to make sure that I'm right. Her statement made me realize that my confidence is not built by always being right, but by being wrong. My past failures have helped to build the confidence I have today. I am only where I am today because I was willing to take the risk of being wrong in order to learn what's right. I've tried, failed but tried again, just another way. It takes stepping out to find out how to win.