I received the chewing out of my career yesterday. It did not feel good and I was ready to give this all up because I have tolerated much over the past couple of years and I didn't want to take another minute. Everyone around me is unhappy and we are all very tired for being pushed 200% when our physical bodies are only able to provide 100-120% (if even that much).
Defeated was the only work I could use to describe what I felt. This one meeting impacted every part of me up until I went to sleep. All I could do was think how my reported project time shows that I am working 170% for the month of February. Who has time for this, really? Imagine how my son has suffered and even my own body for the past couple of weeks. February was the highest reported month, but my other months are all well over 100% too. So, I finally went to sleep after having the privilege to go down and pray at the church. I didn't really feel any better.
It dawned on me as I woke up at the crack of dawn. I am wrong for the way I have been thinking. My mindset is out of the will of God. Though I have the right to cry out in frustration and everything requires me to do a less than 100% job (which is really hard for me as a perfectionist), my attitude has been wrong. God put in my spirit this morning one thing, your mindset has been to barely make it by because you feel you can't give anymore. Physically you cannot, but mentally you can. If I would have just changed the way I approached each situation, I believe I would have avoided the mental beating of my career. You know what, I deserved it because I have been doing nothing but complaining.
Before, I use to laugh at my employers and say in my mind, you are lucky that God requires me to give 100% and do my best in all things. Now, my mind is saying I am blessed for this job and they deserve better.
If you have been complaining about a situation in your life, my advise would be to stop. You are probably justified in your complaints, but you are not right in your mind. Change today. It will make your tomorrow better. God knows.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Sunday, February 08, 2009
2009 Esther Conference
I had an enjoyable time at the Esther Conference this weekend. Being a chaperone was a rewarding experience as I was able to see our girls loving the experience. It is such a blessing to see an altar filled with girls reaching out and seeking God.
Thursday, February 05, 2009
Saturday, January 31, 2009
I am now a Facebooker. I updated my wall with what I am doing. That should make me official. I still need to post pics, but once I get my camera working right, I will get that going as well.
It is about time I get caught up with the times.
It is about time I get caught up with the times.
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Unleashed
Last night at the SoCal HYC was phenomenal. The two words; Anointed Breakthrough.
"Anointed" because the message, the music and the presentation was truly touched by God. As a change from the night before, it ran more smoothly and the atmosphere held an expectation until the breakthrough was received. The music had you jumping on your feet as the worshippers released their worship and ushered even the meek and unknowing to grab a hold of the spirit of worship. I had never seen so many young people singing a song or dancing with their caution thrown to the wind. As I submerged myself into the middle of the crowd, I became a part of a movement that will forever embedded itself in the history of Pentecost.
"Breakthrough" because the heartbeat of God could be felt as Bro Francis poured himself out unto us all even as his voice fought to withhold what he had to say. Even at a crackle of his voice you could feel the desire in him for us to grab a hold of lifestyle evangelism. To love the cities in which we live and to serve those who reside within our communities. We mus be The Called that God has called for us to be and release every single thing we have to offer in order to overcome any giant that stands in our way of reaching the lost. Even when Bro Francis had no more voice to preach, we had desired to hear more because our souls were crying out for the truth in his message and wanted to soak in what we have been missing: the Truth about who we are.
We are a people redeemed by the Mighty God and are called to serve and love the lost. We must be the heroes of our communities. We must be the lights shining on top of the hill combating darkness that has imprisoned our cities. As the called, we must unleash the holy ghost beast in us and overcome the giants of our cities. We must devour Satan's spiritual predators while becoming predators of sin. It is time to stop being at the bottom of the spiritual food chain and time to climb our way to the top.
Last night, knees were bowed and voices wailed out as stomachs were wrenched with the reality of truth. Our hearts were breaking with the things that breaks God's heart. Room was being made in our hearts so that we may passionately love the things that God loves. We were humbled.
"If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land" (2 Chronicles 7:14)
"Anointed" because the message, the music and the presentation was truly touched by God. As a change from the night before, it ran more smoothly and the atmosphere held an expectation until the breakthrough was received. The music had you jumping on your feet as the worshippers released their worship and ushered even the meek and unknowing to grab a hold of the spirit of worship. I had never seen so many young people singing a song or dancing with their caution thrown to the wind. As I submerged myself into the middle of the crowd, I became a part of a movement that will forever embedded itself in the history of Pentecost.
"Breakthrough" because the heartbeat of God could be felt as Bro Francis poured himself out unto us all even as his voice fought to withhold what he had to say. Even at a crackle of his voice you could feel the desire in him for us to grab a hold of lifestyle evangelism. To love the cities in which we live and to serve those who reside within our communities. We mus be The Called that God has called for us to be and release every single thing we have to offer in order to overcome any giant that stands in our way of reaching the lost. Even when Bro Francis had no more voice to preach, we had desired to hear more because our souls were crying out for the truth in his message and wanted to soak in what we have been missing: the Truth about who we are.
We are a people redeemed by the Mighty God and are called to serve and love the lost. We must be the heroes of our communities. We must be the lights shining on top of the hill combating darkness that has imprisoned our cities. As the called, we must unleash the holy ghost beast in us and overcome the giants of our cities. We must devour Satan's spiritual predators while becoming predators of sin. It is time to stop being at the bottom of the spiritual food chain and time to climb our way to the top.
Last night, knees were bowed and voices wailed out as stomachs were wrenched with the reality of truth. Our hearts were breaking with the things that breaks God's heart. Room was being made in our hearts so that we may passionately love the things that God loves. We were humbled.
"If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land" (2 Chronicles 7:14)
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